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Author Topic: Right back at ya, RED!  (Read 2625 times)

Offline cowz

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Right back at ya, RED!
« on: March 09, 2007, 12:35:06 PM »
 ;D

A bartender had the uncanny ability to accurately guess a person's IQ by just looking into his eyes.  Last Friday, a well dressed gentlemen came in and ordered scotch and water.  The bartender assessed the man's IQ to be 151 and he asked the man his opinion about the global warming controversy and received an intelligent and informed response. 

His next customer ordered a Michelob and the bartender guessed his IQ to be 128 and engaged him in a lively discussion about sports.

The next man to come in ordered 3 Wild Turkeys.  The bartended looked him in the eye and saw that the IQ was only 88. He asked, "How many years have you been raising cattle?"

 (lol)
Entrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States. ~ Ronald Reagan

Offline red

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Re: Right back at ya, RED!
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2007, 12:40:20 PM »
groan cowz!
 (lol)
Red
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"
" Some succeed because they are destined to,
but most succeed because they are determined to."
www.redmaplemaines.com

Offline cowz

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Re: Right back at ya, RED!
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2007, 12:49:30 PM »
groan cowz!
 (lol)
Red

Im sorry!!!!!  No offense intended.  Im just sick enough upstairs to like self depreciating humor!

This one is better:

A guy heard that a rancher had a blue heeler for sale that could talk.  Intrigued, he drove to the rancher's house to investigate.  He was met at the yard gate by a blue heeler that said, "Howdy."
Astonished, the guy replied, "It's true... You can talk.  Tell me about yourself."
The blue heeler said, "Well, I discovered my gift of talking pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I took a job with the rancher working cattle, got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired." 
The rancher came out as the dog was telling his story.  When the dog finished, the guy asked the rancher what the dog was worth. 
The rancher said, "I'll be lucky if I can get $10 for him." 
The guy said, "This dog is amazing. Why on earth do you think he's only worth $10?" 
The rancher replied, "Because the dog is a dawgone liar.  Just like now... He never worked for the CIA."
« Last Edit: March 09, 2007, 12:50:29 PM by cowz »
Entrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States. ~ Ronald Reagan

Offline red

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Re: Right back at ya, RED!
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2007, 01:01:49 PM »
My blue heeler is saying right now" Boy, I just love new calf poop!"

 (dog)

Red
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"
" Some succeed because they are destined to,
but most succeed because they are determined to."
www.redmaplemaines.com

Offline garybob

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Re: Right back at ya, RED!
« Reply #4 on: March 09, 2007, 07:07:53 PM »
Remember that, when he licks your face.

Offline red

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Re: Right back at ya, RED!
« Reply #5 on: March 10, 2007, 04:27:46 AM »
Remember that, when he licks your face.

Yes, I always laugh when poeple come over & pet him & he licks them. Have to laugh at my mom who just can't understand why he isn't a house dog.

Red
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"
" Some succeed because they are destined to,
but most succeed because they are determined to."
www.redmaplemaines.com

 

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