cattle jokes

[lfarms]

What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor?

 

[3dfarms]

Ground Beef

 

[lfarms]

Ground Beef

nice, try this

 

[lfarms]

                                  Where do cows like to live?

 

[3dfarms]

St. Moo-is.  Keep em coming...

 

[Angusboy]

whats another name for cattle stealers

 

[trevorgreycattleco]

Stockyard buyers? (pop)

 

[Angusboy]

Stockyard buyers? (pop)

nope beer burgelers

 

[Angusboy]

oops not beer beef sorry haha keep em comin

 

[showqueen95]

What do you call a cattle trailer with nothing in it?

 

[lfarms]

What do you call a cow that doesn't  give milk?

 

[showqueen95]

What do you call a cow that doesn't   give milk?

An udder failure

 

[lfarms]

Where does a cow stop to drink? ???

 

[Angusboy]

what do u call a yong boy cow

 

[cebwtx]

You don't call a boy a cow

 

[Eggbert]

[size=10pt]Livestock Show in Heaven[/size]

One day in heaven, Saint Peter, Saint Paul and Saint John were standing around the barn, near the livestock pens watching the lambs, goats, steers and hogs wander aimlessly through the lush pastures of heaven.

"I am certainly bored," stated John.

"Me too," Paul chimed as Peter stood and watched the animals.

"I know!" Peter began. "Why don't we have a Livestock show?"

Paul and John thought that the idea was great except for one small detail that Paul pointed out. "Who are we to compete against, Peter?" Paul asked.

The trio pondered a moment when Peter realized the answer. "We will call up Satan and invite him to our livestock show. I mean, we have all of the finest show stock here in heaven; all of the Champions from Houston, Denver, Louisville, Kansas City, and all those state fair champions are here as well. His barn is ridden with the spoiled, difficult and mean, untamed, unshowable stock. We are certain to win at the show!"

And so the trio calls up Satan on the other realm communication lines and invited him to their 1st annual Livestock show. Satan laughed and asked why they would want to be humiliated like that, because he would certainly beat them.

Peter, Paul and John did not understand. "What do you mean Satan?" Peter asked. "We have all of the champions from all the majors, and all the state fairs. We have the finest lambs, pigs, goats, and steers that ever walked the earth. How could you possibly beat us?"

Satan paused a moment and then laughed. "Have you forgotten so soon gentlemen? I have all the judges and show jocks!"

 

[brick hollow]

I was once told after having a backwards calf. You must have put the semen in backwards!

 

[drl]

I was once told after having a backwards calf. You must have put the semen in backwards!

I was told that one year but after the 7th backwards calf in a month it got old.