Visiting my parents tomorrow

Help Support Steer Planet:

red

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 20, 2007
Messages
7,850
Location
LaRue, Ohio
The hubby & I (and Woody of course) are going to see my parents tomorrow after church. My dad is suffering from Alzheimer's & some times can't remember much at all. We want to go as much as possible to enjoy the time we can spend while he knows us.
My mom said that cherry pie is his favorite so I made him one today. It's just going to be us & them so it will be a nice quiet visit.

Is anyone else finding it difficult to see your parents getting older? Or have you already lost them? My heart breaks for all that is going through worse than we are.

Show Heifer, not sure if you'll respond to this but I remember you wrote a poem for your dad when he passed. Can you post it? If not for me than the others here?

Red  (angel) (angel)
 

kanshow

Well-known member
Joined
May 24, 2007
Messages
2,660
Location
Kansas
Here's a hug for you Red.    I hope your dad is having a good day.

Yes, it's tough to watch our parents age.  I feel very fortunate to have both of my parents still around and relatively active.  My dad has cancer that thankfully responds to surgery and treatment. 
 

dutch pride

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 17, 2007
Messages
363
Location
SW Michigan
My dad is not doing very well either, both physically and mentally. He has suffered from anxiety for several years. About 3 years ago after about 4 surgeries to try to remove cancer from his jaw, he went threw chemo and radiation and it really knocked him for a loop and he has never fully recovered. He now has been suffering a lot of issues with bipolar disorder. Some days he thinks he can conquer the world but his body will not let him. He falls down and cannot get back up etc. He can no longer drive because he is not safe on the road and got lost even when driving locally. Gets hard to visit with him. He has always been bull headed and it is hard to try to tell him what is best for him.

DLZ
 

red

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 20, 2007
Messages
7,850
Location
LaRue, Ohio
so sorry dutch Pride.  (angel)

We went to my parents today. I think most of the time my dad had no idea who we were.  :'(  He'd get a blank look on his face & was very quiet. We walked the dogs together & I could just tell he was trying to figure who I was. He'd call us those people. It was truly heart breaking.
I told the hubby we need to get there more often. I want to see him as much as possible even if he just barely knows me. Any little glimmer is worth it's weight in gold now.

Red  (angel)
 

fluffer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 6, 2007
Messages
644
Location
Springfield, Ohio
Red,
So sorry your dad wasn't having a good day.  (HUG) but maybe it was just that- a bad day- I hope next time you see him he will be different for you  (angel)

Fluffer
 

red

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 20, 2007
Messages
7,850
Location
LaRue, Ohio
I think it's only going to get worse. My mom said there are less & less good days. He's also had at least 3 mini strokes.

Red  :'(
 

Jenny

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
223
Location
south dakota
My heart goes out to you.
I went to work 8 years ago in a long-term care facility for just one reason and that was health insurance.  I found that there was another benefit and that was that I loved the people that I care for.
Probably close to half of those in the facility are alzheimers patients.  They are precious.  I do think it is alot harder to be watching on the outside than to be them......they are usually pretty content.  A facility can make their everyday life much easier....personal mail me if you would like to visit further.
It is hell to watch your loved one go through this and to assist in the decisions for their care.
 

knabe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 7, 2007
Messages
13,639
Location
Hollister, CA
christmas advice, put something in his hand.  triggering multiple senses seems to help.  my grandmother would tell the same stories over and over to the annoyance of my dad and aunt, but i didn't mind.  ask him what he's thinking.

one thing we did with my grandpa, was tape him telling stories about horse trading.  he didn't have any teeth either, but he sure had a good time.  i think his favorite one was throwing a firecracker underneath a horse that sat down in harness.  he loved to say "GD, if it wasn't a new day."

another thing we would do is go out to the farm and just drive around.  breaking up routine is nice.  it shouldn't matter if he doesn't remember, you do.  cherish every moment.  pretend you are his little girl and don't expect anything.  just sit there and feel his warmth and smell.

knabe
 
Top