"excuses are like assholes, everybody's got one"
"work 5 days a week to survive, work 7 to get ahead"-Dad
"money talks, bullshit walks"
"cows come and cows go, but the bull goes on forever"
"it's kinda one of them deals"-used to describe something thats not exactly normal-i use this one a lot
"if it's got tits or tires it's gonna cost you money kid"-another one from dad
"he'll be just right for Kansas City"-kind of an inside joke used to describe a hard doing POS calf
"stay in the cab"-everybody knows somebody that just needs to stay in the cab whenever you go somewhere
"sexier than a two peckered billy goat"
"like a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest"
"Don't look at me like I'm so bow-legged bastard steer"
"nervous as a whore in church"
"sweating like a dog shittin' tacks"
"git 'r' dun"
"that woman hasn't missed a meal since christ died"
my personal favorite: "she's hotter than a two day tire fire!"